UCanMakeItIfYouTry – How To Be Your Own Best Friend
TOP TIPS
A good friend will take you as you are, love you, and encourage you. If you are a good friend, you do the same. Why, then, do we struggle to treat ourselves the same? After all, the longest relationship we will ever have will be with ourselves. It’s time to learn how to be your own best friend with these helpful tips.
1 – Listen to Your Self-Talk
Do you talk to your best friend the way you speak to yourself? Listen to what your brain has to say the next time something happens. Often, it will be negative self-talk. It’s time to counter negative self-talk with positivity – just like you’d suggest to your best friend.
2 – Get to Know Yourself
Often, people let outside factors affect them and drive their decisions. Spending time to think about your values, likes, and dislikes opens opportunities for self-discovery. You will learn to like and respect yourself for “you” and not worry about what others think.
3 – Don’t Be Afraid to Pat Yourself on the Back
When you accomplish a goal or do something you are proud of, relish it for a few minutes. It’s okay to stand back, be proud, and tell yourself what a good job you did. Please take it in and enjoy the feelings.
4 – Take Some “Me Time”
What did you tell your best friend the last time they called, saying they were stressed and overwhelmed? You may have told them to take the day off. Why not take your own advice? On those days when you need a reprieve, do what you would tell your best friend to do.
5 – Take Time to Laugh at Yourself
One of the best parts of friendship is all the joy and laughter. Don’t be afraid to chuckle at yourself when you do something silly or funny. You are a fun person, so stop taking yourself so seriously.
6 – Accept All of Your Quirks
Accept the fact that you have both good and bad characteristics. Your best friend probably has some quirks that drive you crazy, but you love them anyway. Treat yourself with the same care and understanding.
7 – Learn to Enjoy Time Alone
One-on-one time with your bestie is often the best part of your day. Why can’t spending time with just yourself feel the same? Go for a hike by yourself. Sit in the park and watch the birds. Spend an afternoon strolling through a museum. Learn to like spending time alone.
8 – What Comforts You?
When your best friend has a bad day, you know exactly what to do to comfort them. You know what they like, how to cheer them up. What about you, though? Do you know what comforts you? Do you actively seek this comfort when you need it?
9 – Realize You Are Worthy
We spend time with our best friends because we know they are worth it. This is how you should feel about yourself as well. If you don’t feel worthy of love and care, you will never give yourself that.
FAST-ACTION STEPS
1 – Schedule an afternoon for yourself and do something you have always wanted but never found the time or nerve.
2 – Spend a few minutes each day writing down the negative thoughts you had. Next, ask yourself how you could rephrase what you said.
3 – Write down the advice you give your friends for different aspects of their lives. The next time you need some guidance, turn to this list and take action.
- About the Author
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James Donaldson
Former Owner and Director of The Donaldson Clinic (an outpatient physical therapy clinic)
James completed a 20 year professional basketball career in the spring of 2000. James established The Donaldson Clinic in (January 1990 – 2018) (shortly after a career threatening knee injury) with an idea that he would eventually become a physical therapist. He is a strong advocate for Women & Minority owned businesses and is very involved with various Chambers of Commerce. He understands what it takes to sustain a strong business environment that is conducive to the success of businesses overall.
James is a Washington State University graduate (’79). After an outstanding basketball career with WSU, he went on to play professional basketball in the N.B.A. with the Seattle Supersonics, San Diego/L.A. Clippers, Dallas Mavericks, New York Knicks and Utah Jazz. He also played for several in Spain, Italy and Greece of the European Leagues plus toured with The Harlem Globetrotters to wrap up his career. James was an N.B.A. All-Star in 1988 while playing center for the Dallas Mavericks. In 2006, James was inducted into the Pac – 10 Sports Hall of Fame and also the Washington State University Athletic Hall of Fame.
He now devotes the majority of his time to various community activities, and toward the Gift of Life Foundation, speaking on mental health awareness and suicide prevention. James frequently conducts speaking engagements (motivational, inspirational, educational) for organizations, schools, youth groups and is the author of the published “Standing Above the Crowd” of which you can learn more about at www.standingabovethecrowd.com and is available for sale now.
In 2021, James published Celebrating Your Gift of Life: From the Verge of Suicide to a Life of Purpose and Joy. www.celebratingyourgiftoflife.com
James is a 40+ year resident of Seattle. He believes in being a role model of success and professionalism for the scores of young people that he devotes so much of his time to. He currently serves on several Boards and/or committees and is a member of many organizations. (Please see complete listing on back)
James believes in developing relationships that create a “Win – Win” environment for everyone involved, and being the best he can be!
